Monday, January 30, 2006
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh i miss emmi i miss zhiyong i miss donaphan i miss yanzhen!!! i miss hk too.. i miss having all of u just doors away.. sad... if only time cud stand still there.. so fun.. think i din appreciate it enuff.. how we were given so much freedom like adults too.. ohnoz.. sad!!!yanzhen!!! outing!! when where!?!?!!ahhh our njcsb lower ww n brass section!! section tee!! n outing too!!!
2:16 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Sunday, January 29, 2006
hahaz i duno why but i suddenly wanna blog abt this.. izit wrong to want to be loved? altho many ppl feel that way, but smhow i think its q a selfish feeling.. what is love? is it really possible for everyone to be so selfless in relationships, such as in scenarios where "if u love him/her, let them go, if he/she will find more happiness" how do u noe if u like smone? how do u noe if its not just infatuation, or a desire to be cared for, or smone to think of u almost all the time?how do u maintain a relationship? when we are so caught up with ourselves, and in our own happiness.. we think we noe wads best, but do we? hahaz this post is pointless..
7:47 PM; unforgotten.
Y
hmm went visiting today, then visited an old aunty of my mum's which makes her my grand-aunty i think.. anw she's 92 this yr... one of her eyes cant see anymore and the other can only see blurred images.. she can hardly move and the only way she can obtain nutrients is by a tube linking to her stomach, where liquified food is transferred in directly. i find this image quite saddening. i remember, year after year, she cries everytime my mum visits, because my mum is not even her own daughter, and yet, her own sons and daughters may not always visit each year. Imagine being bound to a chair, conscious of what's going on, but not being able to speak or express how u feel, and the kids you fought so hard to bring up are ungrateful and unappreciative. i think thats quite heartaching..
i hope i wont be so ungrateful too, and not let my parents suffer this kind of misery..
7:37 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Saturday, January 28, 2006
"If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were." Anonymous"A relationship is like a rose, How long it lasts, no one knows; Love can erase an awful past, Love can be yours, you'll see at last; To feel that love, it makes you sigh, To have it leave, you'd rather die; You hope you've found that special rose, 'Cause you love and care for the one you chose." Rob Cella"Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great."
Comte Debussy-Rabutin"You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love." Henry Drummond"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul." Judy Garland"Where there is love, there is life"Mahatama Gandhi"Fear less, hope more;Whine less, breathe more;Talk less, say more;Hate less, love more;And all good things are yours." Swedish Proverb"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." Anonymous"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment."
Buddha"Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead."Anonymousi think the last one's pretty funny..
1:41 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Thursday, January 26, 2006
hmmz tml is cny celebrations and we get to go out cuz early dismissal! weEz.. anw i feel kinda bad.. cuz most ppl are going back to their seconday schools.. and im not.. despite ny being just next door.. unless i can get smone to go back with me.. but everytime i go back.. like.. i feel quite sian diao cuz there are so many ppl going back to then cant really get to tok to the teachers.. then nt fun also.. then go there slack awhile go le.. anw 409 actually have outing de.. but i going out w s21 ppl.. cuz they asked first.. wellz.. not that i xi xin yan jiu or wang en fu yi.. but they did ask before u did ma yiyou.. so ya tiff zr! must be honoured! haha..hmmz anw i wanted to say sth abt a few frens which i haven been toking to alot lately but will always be the people i think of when i think abt secondary sch.. wellz.. from 409 it wud be yiyou, shermeen, stephanie, yingying, weeleng and emily... but 409 rocks too much.. so when i say these few.. i'll think of everyone else in the class hahaz deb kwa xiaogui yanzhen pammie zanne chiewy kitty hahhaz so huai nian.. all the mugging tgt at the old old benches there while eating spaghetti or local delight hahahahaha OH n MR CHAN! our dear form teacher...409.. a class united n oscillating at the same frequency.. >.<yar then from band val sharon eevien yanyun sunyang candy deb yanzhen yanting mel zhuojing eleen marg yumin jacklyn... hahaz i still can rem all ur faces very clearly worZ! *half smiles* hee i haven fgtten yall.. n mr lee, ms chong.. MRS WONG! jasmine tan... maureen chong hahahaz [he sort of reminds me of mr leong]tho we all have taken diff paths now.. i think its alr very fortunate that we get to kp memories of each other =]p.s sry if this post sounds really random.. but i thot i shd give honour to these ppl..
11:16 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Monday, January 23, 2006
Bread for the world: a world of hunger.Wine for all peoples: people who thirst.May we who eat be bread for others.May we who drink pour out our love.Lord Jesus Christ, you are the bread of life,broken to reach and heal the wounds of human pain.Where we divide your people,you are waiting there on bended kneeto wash our feet with endless care.Bread for the world: a world of hunger.
Wine for all peoples: people who thirst.
May we who eat be bread for others.
May we who drink pour out our love.Lord Jesus Christ, you are the wine of peace, poured into hearts once broken and where dryness sleeps.Where we are tired and weary,you are waiting there to be the way which beckons us beyond despair.Bread for the world: a world of hunger.
Wine for all peoples: people who thirst.
May we who eat be bread for others.
May we who drink pour out our love.Lord Jesus Christ, you call us to your feast,at which the rich and pow'rful have become the least.Where we survive on others in our human greed,you walk among us begging for your ev'ry need.Bread for the world: a world of hunger.
Wine for all peoples: people who thirst.
May we who eat be bread for others.
May we who drink pour out our love.
9:04 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Thursday, January 19, 2006
sigh this week is a bad week.. for my physical being anyway..well today i tripped twice, and once i fell quite badly.. practically flew forward a metre.. tho there wasn't any blood [cuz the pathment was smooth] i got myself 4 abrasions and 2 bruises.. it kinda hurts when i bend my joints.. i think due to the impact.. n gosh, showering sure hurts..wads worse, only 2 days ago i walked into the table [those stuck to the chair] and gt a really long bruise... it just started turning black today..duno why i'm so clumsly lately.. but anw, i have been slping quite early the past few days but im still feeling very tired n theres this headache which comes on and off.. n thus explains why im home rite now.. ah wellz.. gna try n slp the headache off... tata
6:08 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
i feel that i've changed... when? i have no idea.. for one, i know i'm definitely clumsier. haha. just today, i walked into an LT seat and got myself a huge, long blue-black.. just great. its really hurts.. for two, i find myself enjoying talking less.. maybe occasionally.. i dont' mind replying people when they talk to me, but i'd rather listen to them talk. sometimes i feel that they don't really want to hear what i have to say anyway. what's more, i rarely have anything interesting or substantial to share.. i'm not depressed right now by the way.. i just realised on my trip back home today that i find myself enjoying the silence more, and reminiscing the times which have passed.. i really miss things as it were.. nowadays, i have a habit of thinking back and holding back tears of happiness and longing..the people around me are falling quite ill, kinda worried.. so all of you people... do take care and drink more water! sleep early and eat healthily! =]
7:50 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Monday, January 16, 2006
having served me for abt a year now.. i think its time for maomao to retire.. for i worry for its safety and hair loss problems.. despite trying to be extra careful, i find myself pulling out a turf of its hair every once in a while.. it deserves its long awaited rest.. now a new bear has taken over but fear not, i will always remember the fun times we shared..to my dear maomao.. >.<
7:55 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Saturday, January 14, 2006
i found this in the barnesbandfest testimonial done by ruth.."Have yourself a very Barney Christmas,Let the flutes shine brightFrom now on,our saxos won't be out of sightHave yourself a very Barney Christmas,Make no trombones gay,From now on, our trumpets won't sound miles away.Here we are as in band fest days,Happy, those 3 days, we were.Faithful clarinets who are dear to usPlaying loud and clear once more.Through the years We all will be together,Even if MOE disallows (hurhur)Don't forget oboe, bassoon and nice tuba.And have yourself a very Barney Christmas now.Here we are like when we were backstage,Looking at the scores by page.French horns scared that they will mess upNow wishing things weren't so far.Through the years We won't forget the perkies,And the euphos tooWho can forget the wonderful conductors too!And have yourself a very Barney Christmas now."sorry if i didn't get anyone in! and blessed Christmas everyone! (:
9:31 PM; unforgotten.
Y
hahaz wee today had our first band prac w the j1s, i think only abt 20 sth came leh.. hopefully more will come if not die le, syf batch..
anw there were 3 euphos.. andy timothy n jiesheng.. yes. all guys. andy n timothy from acs i de, jiesheng from rv.. then the funny thing was that timothy used to be andy's sl [andy is ip] then they kp toking to each other only.. then jiesheng was like telling me, they like dowana tok to him lidat.. hahaz so in the end he was telling me abt zhiyong.. hahaz i found abt thing i nv knew abt zy when he was j1! tsktsk.. then jiesheng kp laughing during band prac cuz he kp thinking of wad zy said abt mr ho... n he kp looking back at nicholas.. haish.. i can imagine the future hahaz.. andy reminds alot of ppl of donaphan!! hahaz.. firstly, he's skinny n q stone stimes.. then he reads treble clef too!! n basically he just looks like boey la.. timothy reminds me of benny, apri's fren.. hahaz..oh n turns out enghong's brother was jiesheng's jnr
today we had sectionals first until 11 lidat then went in for main band... played oregon again.. this time i manage to get all the notes.. but i have to work on expression now.. wonder if we're playing this only for fun or its a candidate for etude.. was supposed to try man of la mancha too.. but no time le.. so mr ho spend the last half an hr or so giving the j1s his annual welcome speech.. think most of them were falling aslp/din noe wad he was toking abt/bored to death.. i was listening to part of it and i was quite blur myself
went for section lunch! hahaz all of them went.. thats great! hahaz.. gd start... anw now even the jnrs also noe abt the ct/nat scandal hahaz oOpz sia.. but it was so coincidental lorhz.. not our fault.. our whole table, which is section, ordered mix [at keai ji/ jin ji] but this time so weird!! it was curry chicken.. then tgt w the fried fish.. seriously v weird combi.. eng hong was eating so slowly cuz of his 2, or izit 4, extracted premolars.. hahaz.. then the curry was too spicy for him too.. he was the last to finish his food.. for once.. smore is only one plate... hahaz wad a surprise..
aft tt we went to serene to get ashley's present.. and buy ice cream!! hehz >.< i noe la! cough le still eat ice cream is zi xun si lu... but i miss the teh tarik ice cream!! =x very nice.. heez.. then aft tt went home le..
haish have to mug organic chem soon.. die le i haven even do hw la.. gones.. dun feel like mugging chem lo.. so much stuff to memorise.. aiyar i go slp awhile first..
5:06 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
think ppl must be thinking i mood swing or sth.. but i really cant help it.firstly, today played oregon.. my first liked-piece. in sec1.. seen the score a few times le.. but i nv really gt the Grandioso part. until now, still cant play properly.. all the accidentals are killing me.. quite high too.. mr ho ended the prac early today, practised alone outside for awhile more.. thank gdness gt lion dance to cover up my disgusting playing.. but by then i alr q destroyed for the day le.. cannot reach F and above anymore.. besson soverign really v hard to sustain..then when i went in to keep instru and take out math to do.. they started playing canon.. then i v sad... cuz of 2 reasons la.. firstly.. cuz everyone there had a part.. its like the song is made for thEM. those ppl thats it.i no part nvm lo.. wanted to play the tbone part, but like very bad, and also v extra.. think cuz the eupho sound too much like everything. like chapalang lidat. can sound like horn, tbone n tuba. then the parts eupho have, will alway coincide w one of these instrus de. so why have a eupho in this kinda solo-ish piece? yes. so next time whenever they play these nice nice things i can go slack..another thing is that everytime when i wanna play, sm ppl always continue playing, n play v fast, then i duno where, they ct always v nice try to tell me where, but end up i hai4 him get lost also.. feel v bad.. so decided to just not play suan le.. hahaz think very stpd but i almost cried.. smhow v sad.. cuz i really wanted to play.. i like tt song.. sigh.. nvmmy class is breeding sick ppl.. meerra, tiffany, stanley and me have flu.. then today during bio, meerra tif and me were blowing our noses tgt, then v noisy ha,, then ms feng commented.. i have to like bring two packets of tissue everyday..sighded.. need to do intergration tutorial until qn 3 la.. gj. but at least in sch during break tt time did abit, then aft band did abit.. yar.. tts all for now..btw.. sry to those ppl hu find my blog seriously boring n no-focus. but my place. my style. i duno why i say this but just had a realisation that all those stuff sm ppl said, were actually toking abt ppl like me.. ha.. think yall dun understand. nvm
8:07 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Monday, January 09, 2006
ahh today had second pe lesson for this yr.. seriously i almsot died.. think too long nv exercise le.. or rather too long nv run.. did 2 warm up rounds.. then this dUNo how u spell it 2 rounds sprinting thing [sounded like fart-leg] waha.. then 3 sets of push ups and 2 sets of shuttle run. seriously the second two was much much easier for me.. my stamina sucks like duno wad la.. i rather u make me do shuttle run 10 times.. but anw alot of ppl cudnt take it too.. so i din feel alone.. many ppl kna muscle pull, wanna puke, cannot stand tt kinda thing.. hahaz. anw think by tml my muscles gna ache like duno wad.. its alr starting to feel alil strained now. haha zi noe i q lousy la.. but zr!! u lucky gal.. escaped the torture.. ohya but lucky is ms chue.. hahaz yay i like her.. weEz..
10:07 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Saturday, January 07, 2006
read sm stuff.. starting to think im really a v bad person.. i wonder wad are the expectations of me.. i duno wad are the things to do n not do anymore.. wads right n wads wrong.. wads selfish n wads not. wads required for survial n wads not...why did humans get smarter.. i think things wud have been alot simpler n manageable if we remained stupid.. As in reALLy stpd..anw just wanted to ask.. isit really wrong to drink? will u then be deemed as a bad catholic?
3:46 PM; unforgotten.
Y
haish i think im starting tobe zi bi again.. ytd din wanna tok to anyone again... duno why at first still ok.. was playing songs with them.. then i gt really really sian diao.. tried to do work but no mood also.. then look at them.. aiyar enjoying their lame selves as usual.. decided to go out to take a walk..was raining again.. maybe it made it slightly worse.. haish saw ct sitting out there w ashley.. but din wanna go over also.. then in the end went to sit at the ampitheatre to watch the rain awhile... but so bad.. i sat there less than 5 mins.. the rain started to stop.. sigh..really felt like getting drenched.. get sick or sth.. since alr coughing anw..felt horrible actually.. tried to play my eupho but duno why no sound come out above F.. the slow songs i play untilvery bu hao ting.. but the feeling in me still there.. haish sad.. went to borrow a trumpet n played "playing love" roughly noe the notes le..thinks is in G major.. or maybe is C major w accidentals... a really nice piece.. the sop sax part even nicer..think the rest of them inside think i attitude or sth.. but i just din wanna go in n join them smhow..like im sm big big lightbulb in a "no lights please" area... or like a cigarette in a "no smoking" region.. haish.. mum called.. so went home first without them.. think v bad.. but it actually felt nice.. haven gone home myself in a long time from sch... haha loner.oh nat told me they thot they did sth wrong.. sry but i think its just me..today woke up from coughing twice.. the second time i couldnt get back to slp le..i think its gna train my abs man.. cough until damn jialat.. trying to do work now.. but feel horrible.. wanna sms smone just for fun.. but i duno hu to sms.. the ppl i used to sms either not arnd or things have changed le.. duno wad to do..feel veryveryvery alone.. but maybe its all in my head.. but lucky xr was online awhile in the morn.. aft tt its me n me again..nat n ashley going to study arnd bkt merah, the rest of them go cindy's bday party.. n i decided to stay home n lock myself in..i duno wads wrong with me.. i had a thot.. maybe this yr i shdnt go band room so much esp if there isnt band.. but yet i think i'll feel sad cuz they prob enjoy themselves alot.. maybe cuz im not there.. i duno.. ha.. im weird..
12:24 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Thursday, January 05, 2006
die i haven been weighing myself and i just did just now... to my horror i gained 1.5 kg! and gna take hgt n wgt nxt mon! gd job.. so im supposed to lose that 1.5 kg in 3days.. means have to eat lesser and be more hyper.. but wah so tiring.. n ive become a glutton ever since i went to hong kong! this is bad n worrying... ohnoz..='[ fattttttso unfair la! why guys can eat so much and not get fat.. bleah.. i wanna be a guy too! ='[
9:14 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Oh dear, the homework is piling up. Well, of course that's because I have been slacking during the holidays. Serves me right. But to see the number of tutorials and vacation exercises all due on friday or the next is quite freaky. I'm beginning to stress out.Was at the bandroom again today, as usual, copying homework. Not from Ching Tong, surprisingly, but from Natalie. Hmm. Anyway, that went on for about two hours, then I decided to play my instrument for awhile. To my horror, i sound like crap. Worse ever. I cant remember if this happened the last time I used this mouthpiece too. I think I should just stick to the old Denis Wick mouthpiece though it's older. I got really demoralised.Anyway, what I wanted to say is that i realised something. i always play the tunes i learnt in nanyang whenever I'm sad more often than not. And i guess I'm really a slow song person. I prefer playing all those slow, sad, expressive tunes. Even though i screw it up and destroy the music.Supposed to do work now. Bye.
9:04 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Monday, January 02, 2006
in 2005 i learnt to treasure the ppl arnd me, for they may leave us when we least expect it..and to be more tolerant to ppl's weaknesses...for they may be very great n nice ppl beyond those weaknesses..
5:53 PM; unforgotten.
Y
