Thursday, January 29, 2004
haish..
duno wats wrong w me again... im getting too emotional.. yanzhen!!! all ur fault.. make me zibei again... im getting too slackish for my own good... got my first ss test back... just as i thot... another failure.. well i wasnt really expecting id pass so lidat...
today thruout the day i was feeling so stressed up... duno why also... theres alot of hw... n i haven studied for tml's phy test... so bye..
duno wats wrong w me again... im getting too emotional.. yanzhen!!! all ur fault.. make me zibei again... im getting too slackish for my own good... got my first ss test back... just as i thot... another failure.. well i wasnt really expecting id pass so lidat...
today thruout the day i was feeling so stressed up... duno why also... theres alot of hw... n i haven studied for tml's phy test... so bye..
4:48 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Wednesday, January 28, 2004
haish... suppose to be studying... but downloading my notes anyway so im here... yup... newae... i initially already like qingtian... but aft tt sat at rochelle's house they play together i'm in love with the song!!! so shuang.. then just nowwas practising the drum part with a metal mug n pot thingie n 2 pairs of chopsticks.. hahaz dad thot i was mad! bleah but oh well hahaz... but i think i can play it abit ready.. i wanna learn the guitar part!!! *heartshaped eyes* hahaz... i wanna burn the jay chou cd leh... heE newae... haish... ytdae yanzhen cried... tt silly ger... making herself stressed... but i totally understand how she feels... cuz i was having the same kinda mentality.. except i din cry infront of everyone... diu lian si le... but haish... just to all juniors... if ure going to get stressed now.. ure wasting ur energy... stress doesnt help in anything... n theres still a long way to go... so dun get obstructed here... but sometimes... crying helps.. n yanzhen... n to the jnrs... if theres ever anything ure stressed abt can come n confide in me...i'll try my best to be available to listen la... this being the sec4 year.. so.. erm ya loh... to everyone... jiayou
6:35 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Sunday, January 25, 2004
just when i thot the wounds will heal sth had to happen... but here... n for the ppl who are reading this.. i wanna apologise for my behaviour... i noe for the past 2 weeks or so..[or longer if u wanna think so] i've been awfully nasty and bleah to ppl esp for a few certain ones... i may have been just vending my anger on u guys... and im really sorry... right now i dun think i care abt mian zi anymore... so its ok if u wanna come up to me n say u suck or anything...
i noe to juniors im like this idiot whom u wanna come n just slap... sorry.. to same batch mates... i noe i've been biased against some of u too... n im really really very very very sorry.. but stimes i really cant help it... i noe saying sorry wun erase all the things i've done but i just wanna do sth to tell u all that im sorry... and to sharon n eevien... im sorry for all the times when i diao u 2 for no reason n kept picking on ur mistakes... i might have been jealous or just plain bitchy... but yea.. sorry..
to why[in the tagboard] i still mean wat i say but...if u can ask that... im sure i did sth wrong to u too... if u want u can come up to me n bleah.. but i think u see my lian se first... cuz i have to admit im abit mad one.. one min can me very high n happy n the next i can be bleahing at ppl ready.. so u might just catch me at the bleah-ie part... yup...
i noe to juniors im like this idiot whom u wanna come n just slap... sorry.. to same batch mates... i noe i've been biased against some of u too... n im really really very very very sorry.. but stimes i really cant help it... i noe saying sorry wun erase all the things i've done but i just wanna do sth to tell u all that im sorry... and to sharon n eevien... im sorry for all the times when i diao u 2 for no reason n kept picking on ur mistakes... i might have been jealous or just plain bitchy... but yea.. sorry..
to why[in the tagboard] i still mean wat i say but...if u can ask that... im sure i did sth wrong to u too... if u want u can come up to me n bleah.. but i think u see my lian se first... cuz i have to admit im abit mad one.. one min can me very high n happy n the next i can be bleahing at ppl ready.. so u might just catch me at the bleah-ie part... yup...
7:34 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Saturday, January 24, 2004
Bored bored bored boreddddddddddddddddddddddd
Bleah tell me again why am I here? I have no idea whahahah laugh my head off… bleahz see her stinky face I wanna puke!!! I noe im being mean but yea.. wat can I say that’s me… so ure unhappy… sue me! Lalallala if not… u can always kill me… more than happy if u do… released from all troubles… haish… har their laughter but I noe I’ll nv be a part of it…wat am i talking abt i also duno
Bleah tell me again why am I here? I have no idea whahahah laugh my head off… bleahz see her stinky face I wanna puke!!! I noe im being mean but yea.. wat can I say that’s me… so ure unhappy… sue me! Lalallala if not… u can always kill me… more than happy if u do… released from all troubles… haish… har their laughter but I noe I’ll nv be a part of it…wat am i talking abt i also duno
12:00 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Friday, January 23, 2004
haish... i duno why but suddenly miss my instru so much.. and my polishing cloth too.. i wana play.. in the old band... not this band... this may sound abit mean but yea... i miss candy deb n yanzhen.. i miss the baritones n bones... haish... bleah... i bet ppl will me asking me to kan kai smile tec etc etc again...
5:44 PM; unforgotten.
Y
oh wow.. just abt a week nv check got so many tags.. think i shall address each one individually...
Chungyan:thanx for all the stuff u tagged yea but... im lidat one... so even if i really smile it'll look very fake... ya so.. i dun really see the point in doing so... but as for U.. u shud smile more while ure still in ur happy period of sec sch..
val: stop being ego... u impt? muahahah er hmpz... ok nvm.. n abt the psychoing things i duno ready.. maybe cause it'll be over soon i let everything show on my face ready... n i got a secret havent tell u.. i wanna tell u but i cant... im so sorry...
xxxxx: whoever u are... thanx for encouragement and all hahaz.. yup... but do u mind just telling me hu u are?
lingxiu: thanx again... but like i told chungyan.. its the same theory.. n i dun think you'll understand anyway..
shifu: hahaz.. act most of the time i AM safely asleep but i duno why i will just wake up in the middle of the nite.. then i'll check my hp.. then if got message then i'll just reply? hahaz guess i scared u again yay! oh n its precisely because im in nycb that makes it so bad.. currently i got so many things i wanna be angry abt... but because its NYCB... i feel very bad for feeling this way towards it... cuz its been my support since sec1 then now lidat... haish suan le
yanyun: u can say im selfish n stuff but i dun like to lie abt my feelings. i dun wanna put on a front then go home n cry n vent anger like u do.. diff ppl, diff personalities, diff results.. yup... not saying ure wrong but.. i dun like changes... yup..
yunfang: oh wow... yet another jnr.. how fun... newae... ok cuz ure going soon. i shall po4 li4 and.. *smiles widely* ok? ok! yayy..
shidi: thats wat im doing ready.. nowadays im desperately trying to spend more time w my classmates ready. im sorry to say this but... i no longer trust band ppl le... at least wo3 de4 batch de4...
yasi: erm.. there are sm things i wanna say but for the good of everyone.. i shant say...but.. yah ok its just lidat.
to everyone... sorry for the times u all have to see my chou lian or listen to my crap.. but thats me, and like eleen once said.. "u either accept me the way i am or u can just ****[ i shall substitute a nicer word] buzz off..." =] esp when im really in a bad mood... so i thik just leave me alone to cool down first yup...cuz when evreyonme suddenly leaves me alone then i'll see their importance then i'll cool down again...yup..
Chungyan:thanx for all the stuff u tagged yea but... im lidat one... so even if i really smile it'll look very fake... ya so.. i dun really see the point in doing so... but as for U.. u shud smile more while ure still in ur happy period of sec sch..
val: stop being ego... u impt? muahahah er hmpz... ok nvm.. n abt the psychoing things i duno ready.. maybe cause it'll be over soon i let everything show on my face ready... n i got a secret havent tell u.. i wanna tell u but i cant... im so sorry...
xxxxx: whoever u are... thanx for encouragement and all hahaz.. yup... but do u mind just telling me hu u are?
lingxiu: thanx again... but like i told chungyan.. its the same theory.. n i dun think you'll understand anyway..
shifu: hahaz.. act most of the time i AM safely asleep but i duno why i will just wake up in the middle of the nite.. then i'll check my hp.. then if got message then i'll just reply? hahaz guess i scared u again yay! oh n its precisely because im in nycb that makes it so bad.. currently i got so many things i wanna be angry abt... but because its NYCB... i feel very bad for feeling this way towards it... cuz its been my support since sec1 then now lidat... haish suan le
yanyun: u can say im selfish n stuff but i dun like to lie abt my feelings. i dun wanna put on a front then go home n cry n vent anger like u do.. diff ppl, diff personalities, diff results.. yup... not saying ure wrong but.. i dun like changes... yup..
yunfang: oh wow... yet another jnr.. how fun... newae... ok cuz ure going soon. i shall po4 li4 and.. *smiles widely* ok? ok! yayy..
shidi: thats wat im doing ready.. nowadays im desperately trying to spend more time w my classmates ready. im sorry to say this but... i no longer trust band ppl le... at least wo3 de4 batch de4...
yasi: erm.. there are sm things i wanna say but for the good of everyone.. i shant say...but.. yah ok its just lidat.
to everyone... sorry for the times u all have to see my chou lian or listen to my crap.. but thats me, and like eleen once said.. "u either accept me the way i am or u can just ****[ i shall substitute a nicer word] buzz off..." =] esp when im really in a bad mood... so i thik just leave me alone to cool down first yup...cuz when evreyonme suddenly leaves me alone then i'll see their importance then i'll cool down again...yup..
12:35 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Friday, January 16, 2004
its tiring to cry every nite.. worse if the reason ure crying no one understands.. n if the only person ure crying for doesnt noe n understand... n the person hu u think will understand doesnt show anything... its even more painful to cry when u feel such a strong feeling of loneliness..
8:38 PM; unforgotten.
Y
haish.. just read rochelle's blog... sad... makes me sorta not want to go jc... oh she din mention me in a certain part! sadder... but nvm...newae her blog sorta make me aBIT grateful that i still belong to nycb... but stimes i really think i dun alrady belong..
like today.. i totally hated today's band prac.. played some rubbish songs... n the canzona score totally "rawks" man.. it looks hand written n the minim took up two spaces and one line.. so we were like ahr so is there a C D or E!? basically its crap... and all the scores where mostly made up of crotchets and rests and weird time like 7/8 and more rest then some boring rhythm n did i say rests?!
yah.. n i cudnt stand the stuff SOME ppl were saying.. cudnt help rolling my eyes.. myabe im biased.. but recently i only go for band to tok to jnrs n val n yanyun... oh well.. quite fed-up with the stuff in the band.. shant say... cuz some ppl maybe reading... but wth.. this is my blog leh.. why m i scared to let them see? bleah.. rubBish..
newae... i cant wait for hand over... i cant wait for march i cant wait for this year to be over... i think i may not want to play for this year's concert ready.. the sooner i go the better.. theres nth making me stay ready..
like today.. i totally hated today's band prac.. played some rubbish songs... n the canzona score totally "rawks" man.. it looks hand written n the minim took up two spaces and one line.. so we were like ahr so is there a C D or E!? basically its crap... and all the scores where mostly made up of crotchets and rests and weird time like 7/8 and more rest then some boring rhythm n did i say rests?!
yah.. n i cudnt stand the stuff SOME ppl were saying.. cudnt help rolling my eyes.. myabe im biased.. but recently i only go for band to tok to jnrs n val n yanyun... oh well.. quite fed-up with the stuff in the band.. shant say... cuz some ppl maybe reading... but wth.. this is my blog leh.. why m i scared to let them see? bleah.. rubBish..
newae... i cant wait for hand over... i cant wait for march i cant wait for this year to be over... i think i may not want to play for this year's concert ready.. the sooner i go the better.. theres nth making me stay ready..
7:39 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Tuesday, January 13, 2004
wahahahz val... dis shud be u too
Your sign of frustration is....Ignoring! Instead
of dealing with problems, you ignore them.
Your theory to problems, is that if I pretend
they are not there, they'll disappear.
Sometimes this method can work, but most of the
time it doesn't. For a variety sometime, try
using one of the other methods, which are
discussed in this quiz. It might feel good!
What sign of frustration are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Your sign of frustration is....Ignoring! Instead
of dealing with problems, you ignore them.
Your theory to problems, is that if I pretend
they are not there, they'll disappear.
Sometimes this method can work, but most of the
time it doesn't. For a variety sometime, try
using one of the other methods, which are
discussed in this quiz. It might feel good!
What sign of frustration are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
6:56 PM; unforgotten.
Y
oh man.. im so sad... listening to all the band songs again...cant helping thinking of the two 2002 concerts... i miss the old band times.. i noe ive said this many times ready.. but.. i keep thinking of hu used to play wat part n hu was sitting where n the memories keep flooding back.. i've been crying everyday ever since 10jan... i duno why but i just feel very xintong.. like i've lost a very important memory of some kind... very sad...help...
n bleah today... in the morning i was walking out to the bustop to meet wai chee in the morn then so many ppl i met dao me...[kat, lingxiu, enghui val etc etc] then some slow reaction [monica, margaret, vivian] but got some nice ppl hu tok to me [yifang shermeen yiyou zhuojing eleen yanyun (hu needed to go toilet)] hahaz... haish.. but miss seeing the sec4s '03 rushing in at like 715? [candy yanner roch kiaying (depending la)]basically.. leads to the same point again...
n bleah today... in the morning i was walking out to the bustop to meet wai chee in the morn then so many ppl i met dao me...[kat, lingxiu, enghui val etc etc] then some slow reaction [monica, margaret, vivian] but got some nice ppl hu tok to me [yifang shermeen yiyou zhuojing eleen yanyun (hu needed to go toilet)] hahaz... haish.. but miss seeing the sec4s '03 rushing in at like 715? [candy yanner roch kiaying (depending la)]basically.. leads to the same point again...
6:50 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Tuesday, January 06, 2004
today sUCks... goodness.. im suppose to be doing hw but must bleah abit first...
tttu screwed up..i very angry w vernyie n sylvia bar 32 there cuz they drag then mess up all our tempos then i din play almost the whole thing k? everyone was playing their own tempo... then 52 was a complete mess.. then bleah 73!!! eEvien came in a bar early for 77 n rUShed.. made her section luan... perc.. nth to say... everyone was off tempo.. 95! tbones rush.. my section gave up trying to play.. end up playing the long notes at some pnt of time.. WAT rubBish...
grand serenade... sharon said our section rushed... but we came in aft the saxes... for me n yanzhen.. we listen more than we watch the conductor..[bet they'll say sth abt tt but HU CAREs] so we follow the pace set by the saxes... n sharon said becuz of US the whole band messed up.. n if we din noe we were rushing we very can3 which means lan4 lah... but SHE din exactly play her solos very well either... im not trying to push the blame n responsibility but... if they themselves are like.. how are they gna command the respect of the band? n they STILL li3 zhi2 qi4 zhuang4 scold the ppl until lidat.. angry..
today i din feel like nycb was my band... i din belong or fit in properly.. at first wen sharon was scolding us.. i THOT i was angry.. but i felt this so many times until.. i ma mu ready... i realise i din really care... which is quite sad.. sharon n ee.. if ure reading this then.. im sorry but this is really how i feel... i felt so much disappointment n anger for the tic, conductoR, u two..sometimes until i no longer love nycb as much anymore.. its not wat it used to be...
i din say a word of the band cheer.. cuz like i said.. not my band...
tttu screwed up..i very angry w vernyie n sylvia bar 32 there cuz they drag then mess up all our tempos then i din play almost the whole thing k? everyone was playing their own tempo... then 52 was a complete mess.. then bleah 73!!! eEvien came in a bar early for 77 n rUShed.. made her section luan... perc.. nth to say... everyone was off tempo.. 95! tbones rush.. my section gave up trying to play.. end up playing the long notes at some pnt of time.. WAT rubBish...
grand serenade... sharon said our section rushed... but we came in aft the saxes... for me n yanzhen.. we listen more than we watch the conductor..[bet they'll say sth abt tt but HU CAREs] so we follow the pace set by the saxes... n sharon said becuz of US the whole band messed up.. n if we din noe we were rushing we very can3 which means lan4 lah... but SHE din exactly play her solos very well either... im not trying to push the blame n responsibility but... if they themselves are like.. how are they gna command the respect of the band? n they STILL li3 zhi2 qi4 zhuang4 scold the ppl until lidat.. angry..
today i din feel like nycb was my band... i din belong or fit in properly.. at first wen sharon was scolding us.. i THOT i was angry.. but i felt this so many times until.. i ma mu ready... i realise i din really care... which is quite sad.. sharon n ee.. if ure reading this then.. im sorry but this is really how i feel... i felt so much disappointment n anger for the tic, conductoR, u two..sometimes until i no longer love nycb as much anymore.. its not wat it used to be...
i din say a word of the band cheer.. cuz like i said.. not my band...
10:06 PM; unforgotten.
Y
Thursday, January 01, 2004
haish... it has been like 5 days since i last blogged... so many things happened but very lazy to say everyhing.. but anyway... HAPPY NEW YEAR yea? oh well.. today was also farewell.. think it turned out q well lah.. but ohno.. major diu lian... hahaz but yanyun rocks.. she acted until very gaoxiao...liven up the atmosphere heh...unlike me.. *zibei* hmm... but yayyy think the skit quite nice lah.. qUIte.. wenyi also very funny... then the sec2s n 1s q ok lah...but i like the prize presentation part.. but very sad... some ppl din turn up...but i think this farewell not very sad.. cuz we noe we still going to see them.. fan er she concert.. i think il cry very badly.. haish.. sad.. shif... erm.. BB... erm.. HAIYAR sec4sssssss..... haish EH?! wrong.. J1s... heh...
ok next.. haish concert.. im so not looking forward to it?[eh same topic wat... wat next maddies] but nvm.. haish i hate planning for concert.. then keep getting scolded.. ppl dun see wat we have dun but wat we haven.. [then val will say "but thats life wat.." then i'll roll my eyes or sth] haiyar.. dowana blog ready.. irritated.. stupid you-noe-hu..[ those ppl involved will noe so yay!!] ok bye..
ok next.. haish concert.. im so not looking forward to it?[eh same topic wat... wat next maddies] but nvm.. haish i hate planning for concert.. then keep getting scolded.. ppl dun see wat we have dun but wat we haven.. [then val will say "but thats life wat.." then i'll roll my eyes or sth] haiyar.. dowana blog ready.. irritated.. stupid you-noe-hu..[ those ppl involved will noe so yay!!] ok bye..
12:56 AM; unforgotten.
Y
